WORLD SUICIDE PREVENTION MONTH
Yesterday, September 10th was World Suicide Prevention Day and the beginning of National Suicide Prevention Week and Month. In commemoration of this day in 2016, two years after my son died by suicide, I felt compelled to share my heart and some of my findings as I went on a journey to pick up the pieces and try to understand a little of where he had been. Though therapeutic for me, I wanted to do what little I could to help others, to encourage those who walk this road, to hopefully help reduce the stigma of this growing health crisis, possibly lessen the future statistics, and journal my story for God's glory and purposes (see 2016 archived post on suicide).
On September 30 of that same year, I surprisingly received a text message with two pictures from Melonie, a dear and long-time friend with a message, "Remembering Clark David tonight and praying for those affected." She and her daughter, Lexi, were on the campus of the University of Alabama for a homecoming football game. They had written my son's name (Clark David Heaton) on a large sign displayed on the quad along with many other names in honor of those who had lost their lives to suicide. She and her daughter's act of love in remembering and praying for us was and is so appreciated. It's the love of God and prayers that helps sustain each of us as we all go through suffering on this Earth.
Clark David was a "normal" 19 year old guy who was loved by many and enjoyed life. There was no indication to anyone at the time that ending his life was on the horizon (Isn't hindsight always 20/20?...later we would learn of his depression, opiod use, and spiritual battle). Now that I'm aware of the warning signs and precautions, I can definitely see how knowing that could be beneficial in helping someone to live a more productive, fruitful life, but not necessarily prolong their life or prevent their death. Only God is the Author of life and death and He holds the keys (1 Samuel 2:6; Revelation 1:18), but we're put here to glorify Him, to love and help others, and manage what He gives us. We don't know the one's God allows to live and the one's He permits to leave. Jesus gave us a new commandment in John 13:34, "Love one another as I have loved you." God puts eternity in our hearts (Ecclesiastes 3:11) and that makes us want to live and help others live. Those that struggle with suicidal thoughts don't want to die, they just want to escape the pain. When we become aware of concerns or crisis most people do whatever they can to help others in their suffering or try to make things better for future generations. For instance, seat belts have helped protect lives, helmets have protected heads, and there have been many medical advancements to help lives. Even with relationship struggles, counselors are available or rehabilitation centers to help those who struggle with substance abuse, or weight loss clinics, whatever it may be, we try to improve and extend the life we've been given. But because I believe in the supreme rule of God, Clark David's days were already numbered (Job 14:5) as mine and yours are. His life couldn't be extended. Why does God allow some to live "longer" and others to die "sooner?" Only God knows, but regardless of the timing, one out of one die. I know God permitted this because He is God (Romans 8:28-29). It doesn't mean there aren't consequences, but God uses all the messes that His children make and restores them to a place of beauty (Isaiah 61:3). With God there is no plan B, just plan A. We may have to take detours along the way, but we will eventually end up where we and God have chosen when we leave this life (that's a hot topic, so enough said about that). Every problem we have has an answer. JESUS IS THE ANSWER! Our hearts are sick and we need a heart transplant by the great Physician (Jeremiah 17:9). Once we ask and receive a new heart, by God's grace, Satan is always lurking around the corner wanting to lead us into temptation so he can destroy lives and our witness for Christ. The Deceiver is a master mind and wants in your mind to tell you lies and get you to believe them about youself and your situation to make you ineffective. As God's standards are compromised or just plain ignored, we'll continue to see more and more lives and families broken because times will get more evil (2 Timothy 3:13). It may look like Satan is winning. He's not. The enemy is defeated! The last chapter of the story has been written and God wins."It may look like I'm surrounded, but I'm surrounded by You."
I received a text last night from another good friend, Brooke, who lives near the Auburn University campus. She told me that four college-age students shared with her just last week stories about someone close to them that had died by suicide. Recently, my sister and sister-in-law have told me of people they knew who have been affected by suicide in addition to each of them recently losing a close friend to a horrific murder-suicide. It's becoming commonplace to hear of such tragedies. Which reminds me all the more of how important it is to reach out, notice warning signs, and talk and connect to people, face-to-face connection, to be intentional about loving your neighbor as yourself. So many people are hurting, depressed, and many times remain silent. We all want to be accepted and loved and it takes a caring heart to notice a broken one. Brooke's campus minister has asked her to give a message on suicide this week which is a small, but important part of helping break the silence, stigma, and be part of the solution. That hits close to home for her because Clark David was a good friend and stays close to her heart.
Since my son's earthly death almost four years ago, I am hearing more awareness stories around the nation in an effort to shed light on this sensitive topic. In my own community, local ministries and leaders came together last Friday evening for a special event to pray for families who have lost someone due to suicide and resources were available and distributed through Cook Ministries. For more information about Cook Ministries, call 256-338-2340, email at CookMinistries@gmail.com or visit www.facebook.com/CookMinistries. Another resource is also Anthem of Hope (www.anthemof hope.org) who will help you find Christian counselors in your area. Focus on the Family is an excellent source of information on teens, depression, and suicide with biblical wisdom to help find the true source of Hope (focusonthefamily.com and search suicide). I have found the best articles on their website to help parents with real stories and suggestions on how to help and to pray and read the Bible with their teens. God's Word, the source of life, is the story of how God never leaves or forsakes His people. Anything to help one's focus on the positives in life instead of the crisis at the moment. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is always open at 800-273-TALK (8255). Don't leave someone alone if they are threatening suicide, call 911 or get help for them.
Even though it's considered "old news" now, on June 5, 2018, Kate Spade (American fashion designer) and Anthony Bourdain (American chef and television personality), just three days later died by suicide. Sixteen days later, news of Bridgette Marshall (Alabama Attorney General Steve Marshall's wife) died by suicide. During the first week of June as the lives of these two prominent celebrities were being discussed, I came across an article I wanted to forget. It talked about people that die by suicide and it stated they don't go to Heaven. Funny thing about it was, they didn't mention that same thing about those that murder or abort babies. I guess "their" standards allow or justify for that. Not that I can set the record straight in people's minds, only God can do that as He does with me, but God makes it clear in Scripture....the only "unpardonable sin" is not accepting and believing on His Son the Lord Jesus Christ for salvation. Those that don't truly know Christ and aren't born-again believers, will die in their sins and be eternally punished in Hell. You don't have to believe me, but it's Truth. There is too much evidence for it not to be true. Search the Scriptures for yourself. That is the proof! If not, read "The Case for Christ" by Lee Strobel or watch the movie by the same name. Jesus is God's Son and was crucified on a cross to save mankind from his sins, past, present, and future sins which includes all sins. All sin is disobedience before a holy God and God holds each person accountable, but those who are born-again believers are no longer condemned (Romans 3:28; 8:15-17). Only God is the judge of one's heart. Only He truly knows what happens before someone ends their life. We know by the Bible it is sin, but God is just in all He does.
Heaven is real, Hell is real, and Jesus IS coming back and no one but the heavenly Father knows when. Heaven will be filled with sinners like you and me, if we put our faith and trust in the Lord Jesus before our life on Earth ends, His blood covers it all.
So, how can you be sure where you're going when you leave this life, no matter how it ends? Well, today I heard a statistic that 94 % of Americans say they believe in God. Pastor Jack Graham said, "It's possible to believe in Jesus and die and wake up in Hell. Even the demons believe. We can say the right words, practice a right religion, but not possess salvation. To be saved means all your sins are forgiven. Jesus lives in you, His presence is present in your life. If you believe in God congratulations, you have the faith of a demon because they believe in God too. They aren't even agnostic or atheist. They believe. Many people have the faith of a demon. They believe Jesus is a good man. The best man. I believe in Jesus they say, but I'm just not in to it. I'm a C student so to speak. I'm pretty sure when I die I will be in a better place. I'm better than others. Well, the demons believe in God and tremble! They actually shudder." He went on to say, "If your religion hasn't changed your life, you better change your religion. Only Jesus can change your life. It's not about head knowledge of Jesus, it's about heart knowledge. Heart knowledge is authentic faith." It's been said, "We practice what we believe, all else is just mere religious talk." As the title to Lauren Daigle's new song, "LOSING MY RELIGION" reminds me...it's not all about what I do for the Lord, but what He has already done for me. There's nothing I can do to earn my entrance into Heaven, it's by grace through faith, but I can do nothing and not accept Jesus' free gift of salvation and gain entrance into Hell. One of two choices. I pray you've made or make the right choice before your time on Earth ends (And just as it is appointed for people to die once--and after this the judgment--Hebrews 9:27).
I lit this candle in memory of Clark David and the thousands of others who have died by suicide as I prayed for my family and family's affected, that they will look to the cross and to the God of all comfort and the only One who can heal their soul.
We wait in hope for the LORD; He is our help and our shield. In Him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name. May your unfailing love be with us, LORD, even as we put our hope in You
(Psalm 33:20-22)
For a believer, the atoning efficacy of Christ's blood covers every sin and every mistake he or she has ever done or will ever do. Scriptures states plainly that God's grace and mercy are beyond our understanding. They declare that His judgments are unsearchable and past finding out (Romans 11:33). There is nothing that can separate us from the love of God in Jesus Christ our Lord -"neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing" (Romans 8:38, 39)Which reminds me of a gospel concert I went to Sunday night. Joseph Habedank, who has a powerful PERSONAL TESTIMONY of getting hooked on opiods and by God's grace overcame it, uses his amazing voice to glorify the Lord with song. In a previous blog post I highlighted this song, but it's worth repeating. Hearing it live was truly a blessing. As I stated above, Jesus' blood covers every sin, and that's the BEAUTY OF THE BLOOD.
(focusonthefamily.com suicide, heaven, and eternal destiny).
Heaven is real, Hell is real, and Jesus IS coming back and no one but the heavenly Father knows when. Heaven will be filled with sinners like you and me, if we put our faith and trust in the Lord Jesus before our life on Earth ends, His blood covers it all.
So, how can you be sure where you're going when you leave this life, no matter how it ends? Well, today I heard a statistic that 94 % of Americans say they believe in God. Pastor Jack Graham said, "It's possible to believe in Jesus and die and wake up in Hell. Even the demons believe. We can say the right words, practice a right religion, but not possess salvation. To be saved means all your sins are forgiven. Jesus lives in you, His presence is present in your life. If you believe in God congratulations, you have the faith of a demon because they believe in God too. They aren't even agnostic or atheist. They believe. Many people have the faith of a demon. They believe Jesus is a good man. The best man. I believe in Jesus they say, but I'm just not in to it. I'm a C student so to speak. I'm pretty sure when I die I will be in a better place. I'm better than others. Well, the demons believe in God and tremble! They actually shudder." He went on to say, "If your religion hasn't changed your life, you better change your religion. Only Jesus can change your life. It's not about head knowledge of Jesus, it's about heart knowledge. Heart knowledge is authentic faith." It's been said, "We practice what we believe, all else is just mere religious talk." As the title to Lauren Daigle's new song, "LOSING MY RELIGION" reminds me...it's not all about what I do for the Lord, but what He has already done for me. There's nothing I can do to earn my entrance into Heaven, it's by grace through faith, but I can do nothing and not accept Jesus' free gift of salvation and gain entrance into Hell. One of two choices. I pray you've made or make the right choice before your time on Earth ends (And just as it is appointed for people to die once--and after this the judgment--Hebrews 9:27).
I lit this candle in memory of Clark David and the thousands of others who have died by suicide as I prayed for my family and family's affected, that they will look to the cross and to the God of all comfort and the only One who can heal their soul.
Jesus can and will heal every wound - "Heal me, O LORD, and I will be healed; Save me and I will be saved, For You are my praise." Jeremiah 17:14 NASB
I thought of you today, but that is nothing new.
I thought about you yesterday and days before that too.
I think of you in silence, I often speak your name.
All I have are memories and your picture in a frame.
Your memory is a keepsake from which I'll never part.
God has you in His arm, I have you in my heart
(In loving memory...Uncle Matt).
(In loving memory...Uncle Matt).
We wait in hope for the LORD; He is our help and our shield. In Him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name. May your unfailing love be with us, LORD, even as we put our hope in You
(Psalm 33:20-22)
I'm also remembering tonight the 2,996 people that lost their lives on the 9.11 terrorists attacks and their families. Any type of loss or loss of life is difficult, but God is still on His throne ruling and reigning, all His promises are true, and one day soon Jesus is coming back to get His own. He will make everything right. Look up, look to the cross, see how much God loves... redemption is drawing nigh (Luke 21:28).
Come to Me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest"
(Matthew 11:28 NLT).
Run to Jesus, cry out to Him! He's always waiting.
Put your hope in Jesus Christ alone....
"Beloved, now we are children of God; and it has not yet been revealed what we shall be, but we know that when He is revealed, we shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He is. And everyone who has this hope in Him purifies himself, just as He is pure." 1 John 3:2-3.
Come to Me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest"
(Matthew 11:28 NLT).
Run to Jesus, cry out to Him! He's always waiting.
Put your hope in Jesus Christ alone....
"Beloved, now we are children of God; and it has not yet been revealed what we shall be, but we know that when He is revealed, we shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He is. And everyone who has this hope in Him purifies himself, just as He is pure." 1 John 3:2-3.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
If you are battling with depression, addiction, or suicidal thoughts, please know YOU ARE NOT ALONE! You are not weak for admitting your need for help! You are not a burden to anyone! Don't believe the lies in your head! YOU ARE LOVED, but more importantly, you are loved by God, your Maker. Help IS available. Choose to talk to someone, share your feelings and get help!
